I once heard someone say (it might have been Gareth Cliff) that all the problems in the world can be traced back to money. Money makes us greedy. Money (or the lack of it) makes us hungry. Money makes us insecure, secure, able, unable, safe, vulnerable, superior…entitled. Get rid of money, and all the world’s problems are sorted. Hunting-and-gathering can recommence. Hypothetically.

But that’s a little difficult, for reasons I surely don’t have to explain. (I’m hoping I don’t have to explain them, because I won’t know how.)

Recently there was a story in social media and the news of a man and a woman in Johannesburg who had something of an altercation in a family restaurant. I chose not to watch the video (of course there’s a video!). I get to choose not to add my view to the millions of others. So, I read short excerpts of the story. That was enough. Some of the points I learnt were:

It happened in a family restaurant.
The man involved in the argument is white.
The woman involved in the argument was black.
This became relevant to the argument at some point.
One person’s child was (allegedly) bullying the other.
The adults couldn’t agree on whose child was the perpetrator and whose child the victim.
The man got all in-your-face aggressive; he even shoved the table and made threatening comments.
The woman responded to the man’s aggression with aggression.
No-one intervened. (Twitter is angry about this.)
Families and kids watched this entire episode live. And then again in the news. And on Twitter and Facebook.

If we are to believe that money is the cause of all misery and aggression on this beautiful earth, then we must relate this incident to money. Which is entirely doable (think “colonialism” – sorry Helen (not sorry)). But if we can’t get rid of the money, how do we stop things like this from happening, escalating and eventually killing people?

I think one answer is kindness. Imagine if both of those adults had approached the situation with kindness. Imagine what the children in that restaurant would have seen (and learnt). Imagine how respectful the exchange could have been – no viral video; no notoriety. Imagine what might have become of the children’s alleged erstwhile bullying.

And imagine we only ever get digital fame for being kind.

Imagine that.

PS: Apparently, the man has been banned from visiting any of the restaurant outlets in future; a sanction that directly affects the man’s child/children, because I know very few parents who would lament being banned from Spur. Apparently, they don’t go there because they want to.